Dog book dating

In that case, disregard this hackneyed phrase, laugh at all his unfunny jokes, and get those pup snuggles in! But honestly, you’re absolutely allowed to ignore this one if he brings his chunky lil’ english bulldog on your coffee date. But try to make yourself feel better by realizing that it is fully okay if you ignore those things and instead focus only on the dogs that you’ll get to meet by meeting these shitty, unoriginal dudes!

There’s something truly unique about the bond between dog and dog owner. We are dog parents, and our parents are dog-grandparents. When you’re going in for a kiss, our dog will probably lick your foot, and when you sleepover, they may or may not chew a hole in any piece of clothing you happen to remove. Not all humans are cuddlers, and even if they are, it’s an occasional occurrence. Who knows maybe the restaurant owner is a dog-lover like us. You’ll hear about our dog’s bowel movements at least once. Sometimes our beloved furry friends have belly aches that make their poop the consistency of peanut butter, and we will most likely tell you about it when it happens (if you’re not with us when we have to clean it up). We most likely have more photos with our dogs than our significant others. We need a little advanced-notice for any spontaneous trips, vacations, or sleepovers.

When you ask us to dinner, we’ll ask if the restaurant allows dogs, even if it is five-stars.

Tell us their names, breeds and one amusing fact per dog.

“I’m 5’8”, and those are two different measurements” Oh cool, a dick joke!

Not only is this a cliche, it’s an immediately sexual one that speaks to the intentions of whoever’s profile it’s on.

I found out the dog was writing about me, so it was an act of self-defense.

Actually, having a joyful and optimistic main character is an easy move for a humor writer, and there is a lot to laugh about in A Dog’s Journey. More than ten years ago I was on the stairmaster and the woman next to me was a published author.

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